"Then I heard the voice of the Lord saying, "Whom shall I send? And who will go for us?" And I said, "Here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8 NIV
I learned a new word a couple of weeks ago. The word is Hineni. I not only heard it one time that week, but I ended up coming across it twice within the same week. Once in a sermon and the other time in an email. It is a Hebrew word and it means quite literally, " Here am I." Hineni is used at least four times in the Bible. The first time was when God called out Moses from the burning bush, the second time was when God approached Abraham to ask to sacrifice his only son, Abraham, the third time was when God called out to a young Samuel and then lastly when God asked the prophet Isaiah, who would go for Him. Isaiah, without hesitation, said, "Here am I. Send me!" Isaiah 6:8 NIV.
Most of the time, it is very easy to say yes to the Lord when we are confident that we are being sent out. However, our yes to His call is usually met with hesitation. Furthermore, along with our hesitation, we bring our fears, our doubts, our past failures, our distractions, and anything else that can keep us from trusting God fully in our call. This is especially true when He calls us to go and live it out fully. It is almost as if we have one foot in the world and the other foot in the kingdom. However, this does not mean that God can't use us when we have hesitations when we answer His call, but the question is how much more could He use us when we say "Hineni" with complete confidence in Him?
In Psalm 139, David writes, "You have searched me, Lord and you know me. You know when I sit and when I rise; you perceive my thoughts from afar. You discern my going out and my lying down; you are familiar with all my ways. Before a word is on my tongue, you Lord, know it completely. You hem me in behind and before and you lay your hand upon me. Such knowledge is too wonderful for me, too lofty for me to attain. Where can I go from your Spirit? Where can I flee from your presence? If I go up to the heavens you are there; if I make my bed in the depths, you are there. If I rise on the wings of the dawn, if I settle on the far side of the sea, even there your hand will guide me, your right hand will hold me fast. If I say, "Surely, the darkness will hide me and the light become night around me," even the darkness will not be dark to you; the night will shine like the day, for darkness is as light to you. For you created me in my inmost being; you knit me together in my mother's womb. I praise you because I am fearfully and wonderfully made; your works are wonderful and I know that full well. My frame was not hidden from you when I was made in the secret place, when I was woven together in the depths of the earth. Your eyes saw my unformed body; all the days ordained for me were written in your book before one of them came to be. How precious to me are your thoughts, God! How vast is the sum of them! Were I to count them they would outnumber the grains of the sand---when I awake, I am still with you. If only you, God would slay the wicked! Away from me, you who are bloodthirsty! They speak of you with evil intent; your adversaries misuse your name. Do I not hate those who hate you, Lord and abhor those who are in rebellion against you? I have nothing but hatred for them; I count them my enemies. Search me God, and know my heart; test me and know my anxious thoughts. See if there is any wicked way in me and lead me in the way of everlasting."
My fellow readers, God knows everything about us. He knows the good, the bad, and the ugly. He knows our past failures, our insecurities, and our regrets. He knows us because He made us, and yet He still calls us out. He does this so we can then be called into a deeper relationship with Him. It is for our good and His glory. We are limited and He is limitless. We do not need to fear anything because He goes before us and He will not leave us or forsake us. Surrender your doubts, surrender your fears, and surrender your past regrets. Finally, when He calls, GO! GO in peace. GO in confidence. Better yet, GO in Hineni.
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